


Tears And Kisses On Cold Kitchen Tiles

by celfira



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: :c, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Hugs, Jealousy, Kinda, Kisses, M/M, Misunderstandings, Nightmares, Sad, They Live In Russia, Yuuri's insecurities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-22
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-18 01:40:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13089741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celfira/pseuds/celfira
Summary: "Please don’t disappoint me like that fat pig did.”Upon closer inspection, what the woman is wearing looks awfully close to Yuuri’s Eros costume. A loud sob escapes his throat.“Yuuri, please! You’re interrupting our practice session! You had your chance, leave!” Viktor's voice is angry and hard.





	Tears And Kisses On Cold Kitchen Tiles

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this quite a while ago and forgot it existed, lel. Finally typed it out, here you go o/
> 
> english is not my native tongue, please be gentle with me! ;3;

Their stay in Russia is very hard for Yuuri at first. He doesn't speak Russian very well, he’s far away from home (yet again) and at no time of the day does he have the ice rink all to himself.

But what bothers him more than all those things combined is that here in Russia, even more people recognize Viktor for who he is: world’s best and hottest ice skater. When they walk down the street to go shopping for groceries or simply taking a stroll in the nearby park with Makkachin, they are often interrupted by excited fans.

Though Yuuri understands only a few words of their conversations with Viktor, some of those fans seem to be mostly professional; praising him for his form, asking if he really isn’t retiring after all and thanking him for not doing so; until finally they state their curiosity about next year’s program, then requesting an autograph before they leave.

Yuuri doesn’t mind these fans as much as they are invading their private bubble whenever the couple dares to take a step outside of their (Viktor’s) apartment. But Yuuri can deal with that, even though it makes him a little bit sad that barely any people recognize him as a skater too, or at least as Viktor’s fiance.

But then there are the fan-girls. Yuuri can easily tell those shameless human beings from the more serious and reserved fans.

They openly flirt with Viktor right in front of him, like they don’t even know who Yuuri is. Which they don’t. That hurts, but not as much as seeing Viktor respond to them in kind. With warm smiles and gentle words. Even when they lean forward way too much with their slutty wide-cut v-necks or stand far too close to be considered polite.

Viktor patiently converses with them, on rare occasions signs the random items they frantically pull out of their bags in search for something, anything, the famous skater could write on. And when the girls are especially brave and ask for it, he even hugs them.

Yuuri knows, that in those moments, he should be boiling with anger and jealousy. But instead he simply feels sad, disappointed and defeated. Whether he feels more disappointed with himself or with Viktor, he’s not sure.

Those kind of meetings always ruin his mood. Most times, Viktor picks up on that (not on the reason though, it seems) and spoils him rotten by carrying him from the doorstep straight to their bed when they come home. After a long and affectionate kiss, they bury themselves underneath all the blankets that have accumulated there over the time and cuddle until Yuuri announces that he feels better.

It would be nice and soothing if Yuuri’s brain wouldn’t interpret Viktor’s actions with guilt instead of love and worry.

_____________________________

 

One day, when Yuuri is particularly exhausted after practice, Viktor offers to let him rest at home to go grocery shopping by himself, and with his sore muscles he gladly accepts.

The tired figure skater collapses in front of the TV - with a blanket stolen from their bedroom - the moment the door closes behind Viktor. He lazily turns on the TV, not caring about the channel, just wanting some background noise since it was awfully quiet with Makkachin asleep curled up on the bed in the other room. Yuuri lays there, drifting in and out of sleep, waiting for Viktor.

When he finally comes back he joins the younger man on the couch after quickly putting away what he had bought. He crawls under the blanket to lie halfway on top of Yuuri, his arms wound around him, nuzzling into his neck.

Yuuri smiles, sighing happily and returning the hug, lightly trailing his fingers up and down the other’s back. Viktor as well, sighs contentedly and turns his head a bit to place a kiss on Yuuri’s cheek. When Viktor speaks, the Japanese can feel his slightly cold lips move against his skin and it makes him shudder,  “I met some girls down at the store, they invited me to brunch, the silly lot! At that small diner we went to once! Remember? You let me order for you since you couldn’t read the menu and when our food arrived, you should’ve seen your face!”

Viktor breaks out laughing, his warm body gently shaking next to Yuuri’s. But all of a sudden, Yuuri wasn’t in the mood for laughing at all. Or smiling, for that matter. Or even cuddling. His hands stop dead in their tracks.

“I’ve never been invited to a meal by fans. No-one has ever been this bold, i guess,” the grey haired man nods enthusiastically against Yuuri’s chest. The latter doesn’t say anything, simply hums as he feels his heart twinge painfully. For a brief moment he wonders if Viktor can feel it too, his pain spreading against the cheek that’s rubbing over his chest.

Why does being asked out by some fan-girls excite Viktor when he already has Yuuri? Is Viktor getting tired of him? Is he just waiting for the right moment to drop Yuuri? Why else would he want to meet female fans? His brain desperately tries to find an answer that would calm Yuuri’s nerves, but it can’t come up with a single one.

The older one’s embrace doesn’t feel quite as warm as it did when he first fell on top of him. He can’t bear the feeling any longer so he sits up, almost pushing Viktor off the couch in the process. He doesn’t bother to help him up, immediately stands and hurries towards the kitchen to hide his face, which is undoubtedly speaking volumes on how disappointed and vulnerable he is at that moment.

Without looking back at his fiance, he calls, “Anyways, I’ve rested enough, I’ll make dinner. You can take out Makkachin, he’s been sleeping too.” He ignores the irritated huff that comes back and forces himself to focus on cooking.

Viktor doesn’t mention the girls or his date with them again for the whole evening.

_____________________________

 

_Yuuri is standing on the edge of the rink behind the barrier. He is in normal clothes, no skates in his hands and no sports bag slung over his shoulder either._

_Why is he here if not for practice? And where is Viktor?_ _He looks around, turning, scanning the large and dark room for his lover, or Yuri, or any other skaters or coaches. But he is completely alone._

_When he is searching for an exit, a sharp sound makes him turn back towards the ice again. A sound he knows better than anything else; the sound of ice being carved into by metal._

_This time, there are two figures. One is a girl with long, wavy hair, flying behind her as she twists and turns gracefully on the ice. She is breathtakingly beautiful, her form meticulously perfect._

_As Yuuri is watching her, she flawlessly executes a Quad Flip with seemingly no effort at all. The other person on the ice applauds energetically as the woman enters a loop of never ending Quad Flips. It makes Yuuri dizzy, just by watching her._

_He looks over and is shocked to find Viktor standing there, clapping._

_What is he doing there? Is he coaching her? Would Viktor betray him like that?_

_To make matters worse, the Russian speaks, “You look absolutely vkusno! But we still have a lot of work to do. Please don’t disappoint me like that fat pig did.”_

_Bile rises up in Yuuri’s throat. He falls forward a step to steady himself by holding onto the barrier._

_The sound of the woman’s skates scratching over the ice gets louder and he glances up just in time to see her skate past him. Upon closer inspection, what she is wearing looks awfully close to Yuuri’s Eros costume. A loud sob escapes his throat._

_“Yuuri, please! You’re interrupting our practice session! You had your chance, leave,” Viktor’s voice had been smooth and gentle when he had talked to the woman, but now it's angry and hard._

_The Japanese stands there, unable to move, shaking, heartbroken, betrayed._

_“Leave, Yuuri! Yuuri!”_

_He closes his eyes and shakes his head, trying to will the scene in front of him away._

_“Yuuri! My sweet Yuur!”_

_This time, Viktor’s voice sounds different. Closer, warmer and definitely more concerned._

Yuuri slowly opens his eyes again and he’s back in their shared bedroom. He’s way too warm even though his sheets lay forgotten at the foot of the bed, kicked there sometime during his nightmare, he assumes. Viktor is leaning over him, his brows furrowed in worry. Yuuri sits up aprubtly, pulling Viktor’s hands from the sides of his face and almost knocks into him.

“Yuuri! You’re finally awake! Were you having a nightmare? You were shaking and sobbing so much that it woke me up. I’m glad, I tried to-”

“Sorry,” Yuuri mumbles, cutting him off. He lets his head hang low, ashamed that he had disrupted the other’s sleep. He doesn't want to annoy Viktor any further so he turns away from him to lets his feet dangle off the side of the bed. “I’m sorry, I’ll sleep on the couch, it's way too warm in here.”

He slips off the bed but Viktor grabs his arm, “You don't have to, Yuuri! We can open a window to let in some cold air! You should tell me if you can’t sleep when it’s too warm! I’ll-”

“No,” Yuuri interrupts him again.

“Yuuri?” Viktor sounds desperate and Yuuri can't see him, but he's pretty sure he has the kicked-puppy-look on his face.

“Sorry, but I just need some space right now. Please don’t worry,” Yuuri gently removes Viktor’s hand and stands up. For emphasis, he looks over his shoulder and forces a sad little smile, though he is unable to look his fiance in the eyes.

Viktor doesn’t say anything as Yuuri leaves the room, the “click” of the door falling shut behind him cutting through the heavy silence.

_____________________________

 

Yuuri wakes up the next morning with a stiff neck and is surprised to hear Viktor working in the kitchen. He had barely slept, cause it had been to cold and too lonely for Yuuri's mind to come to a rest. Dream-Viktor's hard voice relentlessly pursuing him as well as the fear of losing him to one of the girls he will meet today in that cozy diner, where the two of them had spent such a lovely evening.

A strange smell permeates the air. When Yuuri reluctantly gets up and drags himself into the kitchen, he’s greeted with a cheerful, “Good morning, Zolotse! Are you feeling better now? Shall we leave the bedroom window open every night from now on? I wouldn’t mind, of course not! If it means that my Yuuri will sleep better!” The older skater is fumbling with a spatula, trying to peel a pancake off the pan, while looking over his shoulder at Yuuri with a too-bright smile. His rambling sounds suspiciously guilty to the Japanese man’s anxiety-ridden brain.

Also; Viktor never makes breakfast. He’s a terrible cook, always skillfully shoving that task onto Yuuri instead. So if Viktor is making breakfast right now, something is definitely wrong.

“What are you doing?” is everything that Yuuri can say.

“Pancakes, isn’t it obvious?” slightly confused, Viktor finally manages to flip one over and carefully places it on a plate, on top of some of his earlier experiments. They all look several shades too dark to be edible. Swiftly, he begins to work on the next one.

Yuuri almost feels sorry for the pancakes and for Viktor, for that matter. And he almost makes a joke about them really being unrecognizable. Almost. He swallows.

“Look Yuuri, I couldn’t sleep for a single second after you left the bed last night and if you really-”

“What I meant was: What are you still doing here when you’re invited to brunch with those nice girls you met? Aren’t you late? You’re not even dressed,” Yuuri gestures towards the loose shirt and boxers Viktor is still in. The words come out harsher and colder than he had expected, Yuuri blames the missing sleep and the fact that he just woke up to the smell of burned pancakes.

He doesn’t dare to look Viktor in the eyes, keeps his glues to the cold tile floor.

After a short silence, Viktor gasps. “I- I almost forgot about them,” he says, panic rising in his voice.

“How rude!” Yuuri snaps, hands curling into trembling fists at his sides. Those girls were probably really looking forward to that date and Viktor had the nerve to just forget about them?

“Oh, solnyshko, did you-, were you thinking- ?” Viktor sounds kind of desperate. It’s because he just realized he finally can’t deny any longer that he wants to break up, Yuuri’s brain helpfully supplies.

“Oh Yuuri, is this why you slept on the couch? Was this bothering you?” the younger skater couldn’t do or say anything, but Viktor knew the answer anyway. “Fuck,” Viktor swears and takes a few cautious steps forward, “I almost forgot about them because I wasn’t planning to go in the first place. They were nice but none of them compare to you. Nobody compares to you, moya lyubov.”

Viktor moves further towards Yuuri, holding out his hands, reminiscent of someone carefully closing in on a frightened animal. “Not forgetting would have been rude, because I am engaged,” with a final step, he reaches Yuuri and encloses him in his arms.

The latter falls into the hug gladly, returning it fiercely while breaking into tears of relief and embarrassment. “I’m s-sorry,” he sobs, barely comprehensive, “I’m sorry I dou-doubted you.”

“Don’t ever be sorry for something like that. I’m just glad we worked through it early enough so that it didn’t break us,” Viktor responds calmly, slowly lowering them to the floor and pulling his fiance to sit in his lap, “I’m sorry for not immediately telling you that I would not go to meet them and why. I'm sorry for making you worry.”

Yuuri hums and lets himself be held, reveling in the closeness and bathing in the relief that his negative assumptions had been proven wrong. Tears roll down his cheeks and fall on the Russian's shirt, painting a dim pattern on the soft fabric.

“I was just so scared that you’d leave me. You know that I’m not very confident in my body, but those girls were probably…” a part of him already knows what Viktor will say to the self-degrading notion in his explanation, but another, darker, selfish part of Yuuri wanted to hear it once again. Let his worries be eliminated - maybe not once and for all, but for right now. In the smoldering heat of the Russian's tight embrace, in this moment, he thinks that he can let himself feel absolutely loved, without a doubt.

“Solnyshko, I will remind you as often as I have to, that for me, you are the most beautiful and perfect fiance I could ever wish for and that I will stay by your side for as long as you’ll allow me,” Viktor tells him softly, and Yuuri can’t help but smile fondly, his heart swelling in his chest.

“You wanna know what I told those girls?” there's an air of mischief in Viktor’s voice as he says that, so Yuuri leans back a tad to look at him. “Do I want to know?” he asks, raising an eyebrow at his lover. A final tear escapes his eye and Viktor catches it with his thumb and slowly wipes it away. “I told them that the offer was nice, but that I couldn’t go since I’m engaged to the hottest man alive and that he’s very well endowed and skillful and also that he’s waiting for me at home-”

“Viiiiiiktor!” a blush spreads across Yuuri’s tear streaked cheeks.

“-and that by lunchtime today I surely won’t be able to walk courtesy of aforementioned fiance,” Viktor finishes with a self-satisfied grin.

“Oh my god,” said fiance buries his face in his hands, suddenly somewhat grateful that he hadn’t joined Viktor on the shopping trip. Surely, even with him right there, Viktor’s reply would have turned out equally as lewd.

“You know, we still have two hours left to make what I said come true,” the older man purrs seductively, wiggling his eyebrows.

At that, Yuuri can’t help but burst out laughing because of the sheer ridiculousness of it all. They're both so crazy for each other, yet worry so much about the other’s feelings towards them. At a time like this, drowning in happiness, Yuuri can even believe that.

He wants this moment to never end.

Viktor starts to laugh too and peppers his face with dozens of feather-light kisses.

Once they have relatively calmed down, Viktor suggests that they eat his pancakes and then get back the sleep they had both missed out on.

“I will not eat those pancakes but I agree with you on the rest,” Yuuri says between his laughter.

As they reluctantly disentangle themselves and get up from the floor, Yuuri remembers something, “One more thing, Viktor: You have to promise me to never make food again without me begging you to. You almost gave me a heart attack!”

Viktor giggles mischievously and answers gladly with: “I promise.”

**Author's Note:**

> this is not beta'd, so if you find any mistakes, typos, etc feel free to point them out to me! c:
> 
> thank you soooo much for reading <3 <3
> 
> kudos and comments are muuuch appreciated ;3


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